(Intro)
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Take the National Express
when your life's in a mess
It'll make you smile...

All human life is here
From the feeble old dear
to the screaming child

From the student who knows
that to have one of those
would be suicide

To the family man
manhandling the pram
with paternal pride...

And everybody sings
Yeah, Ah ha, Alright
We're going where the air is free

On the National Express
there's a jolly hostess
selling Crisps and Tea

She'll provide you with drinks
and theatrical winks
for a skyhigh fee

Miniskirts were in style
when she danced down the aisle
Back in sixty three

But it's hard to get by
when your arse is the size
of a small country...

And everybody sings
Yeah, Ah ha, Alright

We're going where the air is free
Tomorrow, tomorrow belongs to me

When you're sad and feeling blue
with nothing better to do

Don't just sit there feeling stressed
Take a trip on the National Express

On the National Express
Let's go....

(Guitar
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National Express
National Express

National Express
National Express

National Express
National Express

National Express
National Express

NationalExpr